Lawak Komputer (Computer Jokes)
Computer Tips
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* Buy a Pentium 686/300, so you can reboot/shutdown faster.
* 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2 (especially with the old Pentium chip).
* Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
* My software never has bugs; it just develops random features.
* C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL
* C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN
* Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put in new ones.
* The name is Baud... James Baud.
* Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!
* C:\ Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.
* Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! STAAAY...
* Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or file name!"
* As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
* Backups? We don't need no stinking backups.
* E Pluribus Modem
* C:\ File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
* A mainframe: the biggest PC peripheral available.
* An error? Impossible! My modem is error correcting.
* CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C (Y/N)?
* A computer's attention span is as long as its power cord.
* 11th commandment - Covet not thy neighbor's Pentium.
* Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.
* Windows: Just another pain in the glass.
* SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .
* RAM disk is *not* an installation procedure.
* All computers wait at the same speed.
* Computer (dfn): A device designed to speed and automate errors.
* Press to continue ...Smash forehead on keyboard to continue... Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue... Just do something!!
* E-mail returned to sender -- insufficient voltage.
* Help! I've modemed and I can't hang up!!
* All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?
* Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.
* "640Kb (memory) ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981
* DOS Tip #17: Add DEVICE=FNGRCROS.SYS to CONFIG.SYS
* Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!
* Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...
* Excuse me for butting in, but I'm interrupt-driven.
* Sped up my XT; ran it on 220v! Works greO?_~"
* Error reading FAT record: Try the SKINNY one? (Y/N)
* Read my chips: No new upgrades!
* Hit any user to continue.
* 2400 Baud makes you want to get out and push!!
* I hit the CTRL key but I'm still not in control!
* Will the information superhighway have any rest stops?
* Disk Full - Press F1 to belch.
* Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (V)omit
* (A)bort, (R)etry, (T)ake down entire network?
* If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.
* Programmer - A red-eyed, mumbling mammal capable of conversing with inanimate objects.
* Real programmers don't document. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand."
* Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers.
* Relax, it's only ONES and ZEROS!
* Will configure ones and zeros for food!
Contributed by: Unknown
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
* Buy a Pentium 686/300, so you can reboot/shutdown faster.
* 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2 (especially with the old Pentium chip).
* Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
* My software never has bugs; it just develops random features.
* C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL
* C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN
* Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put in new ones.
* The name is Baud... James Baud.
* Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!
* C:\ Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.
* Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! STAAAY...
* Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or file name!"
* As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
* Backups? We don't need no stinking backups.
* E Pluribus Modem
* C:\ File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
* A mainframe: the biggest PC peripheral available.
* An error? Impossible! My modem is error correcting.
* CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C (Y/N)?
* A computer's attention span is as long as its power cord.
* 11th commandment - Covet not thy neighbor's Pentium.
* Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.
* Windows: Just another pain in the glass.
* SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .
* RAM disk is *not* an installation procedure.
* All computers wait at the same speed.
* Computer (dfn): A device designed to speed and automate errors.
* Press to continue ...Smash forehead on keyboard to continue... Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue... Just do something!!
* E-mail returned to sender -- insufficient voltage.
* Help! I've modemed and I can't hang up!!
* All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?
* Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.
* "640Kb (memory) ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981
* DOS Tip #17: Add DEVICE=FNGRCROS.SYS to CONFIG.SYS
* Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!
* Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...
* Excuse me for butting in, but I'm interrupt-driven.
* Sped up my XT; ran it on 220v! Works greO?_~"
* Error reading FAT record: Try the SKINNY one? (Y/N)
* Read my chips: No new upgrades!
* Hit any user to continue.
* 2400 Baud makes you want to get out and push!!
* I hit the CTRL key but I'm still not in control!
* Will the information superhighway have any rest stops?
* Disk Full - Press F1 to belch.
* Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (V)omit
* (A)bort, (R)etry, (T)ake down entire network?
* If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.
* Programmer - A red-eyed, mumbling mammal capable of conversing with inanimate objects.
* Real programmers don't document. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand."
* Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers.
* Relax, it's only ONES and ZEROS!
* Will configure ones and zeros for food!
Contributed by: Unknown
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